Sheldon Penny WAR!
by ShennyFTW
Summary: Howard says dramatically, "last time it happened, it was a battle season 2 panty Piñata . This time...it is WAR!"- Sheldon and Penny pushed each other’s nerves too hard. The war has begun! da da DAAA!
1. Avenue Q

Penny entered Leonard and Sheldon's apartment as if it was her own, then she curtsied. She was expecting applause, so she looked up to see Sheldon staring at her from the kitchen bench. Penny looked around but Leonard, Howard and Raj, the people she was expecting to applaud for her, weren't anywhere.

"They went to get the take out," Sheldon responded before she could ask. After he said it, Penny's face turned into a childish pout, Sheldon thinks that's what it looks like, so he rolled his eyes and said,

"Don't worry, they'll be back soon to feed your ego," he put on a fake smile.

"My ego is not as big as yours Sheldon," Penny snapped back at him casually, as if this was a normal conversation.

Sheldon handed her a glass of water, then responded, "at least I have reasons for my ego. I am gifted and talented."

Penny stopped the conversation visage and half yelled, "Heeey! What's that supposed to mean!?!" Penny knew it was a cross-line, a 'don't go there' question. But of course Sheldon didn't catch her tone, so he said,

"Obviously it means you are not talented, for example in the play you just performed in."

"Hey, just so you know, I worked hard to get into _Avenue Q_." Penny yelled.

"Exactly, Penny. I must point out, that you didn't need to act. Plus acting is a silly career choice, people who enter that occupation, only see them for what others see them as," Sheldon calmly retorted.

"I do acting because I love doing it. Hey, I don't need to justify myself for you. I'm leaving."

"Did I cross a line, Penny?" Sheldon didn't know what reaction he would get from her, when he said those things.

"Oh yes, a big line Sheldon! You have hurt me by insulting the things I love."

"I don't understand that feeling."

Penny had the door open to leave, "Mark my words, Dr. Sheldon Cooper; you will understand the hurt, when I take the things you love!" She slammed the door behind her.

She stomped over to her apartment, furious, when Leonard came up the stairs with Howard and Raj.

"Aren't you coming over to our apartment, to celebrate your wonderful performance Penny?" Leonard asked. But Penny gave them a cold stare, and then slammed the door in their faces.

"What's up with Penny?" Raj asked.

"I bet someone knows," Howard responded.

Leonard opened the door to his apartment; the three of them looked through the door to see what Sheldon was doing. Sheldon was sitting at his desk chair, thinking.

Then Sheldon said out loud, "'Things that I love'" then he laughed, in the way he laughs, and said, "The list should be small."

Sheldon smiled and said, "Plus she won't be able to get me back until I come back, because I am going on a train to San Francisco, tomorrow."

Leonard, Howard and Raj didn't want to get involved with Sheldon and Penny's fights, so they didn't ask. They just have to wait, until it blows over.


	2. Train Delay

_I've never actually been on a train, so I don't know if you need a train ticket. I'm just following Harry Potter and his ticket for Platform nine and three quarters._

Penny tossed and turned in her bed, she was still fuming at what Sheldon said to her earlier. I have to get back at him, she thought. Penny sat up in bed; her alarm clock said it was 1:30 in the morning.

She couldn't go to sleep with vengeance on her mind.

"What does Sheldon love?" she said out loud. Penny thought for a long time, eventually her mind clicked that Sheldon was going to San Francisco tomorrow, well... technically today, by train.

"HA" Penny laughed out loud and snapped her fingers,

"That's it! He loves trains!" An evil, diabolical plan formed in her head.

Penny grabbed her spare key and opened the door to Leonard and Sheldon's apartment. She easily found Sheldon's suitcase with his train ticket on top. A smile crept on Penny's face as she took his ticket and went back to bed.

*

Next morning, Leonard was making oatmeal for oatmeal day, when Sheldon walked in the room with a smile on his face and a bounce in his step. He was going to catch a train today.

"Good morning, Leonard," Sheldon said cheerily.

"Morning," Leonard groggily responded, he was driving Sheldon to the train station.

Leonard handed Sheldon his oatmeal, then Sheldon walked past his suitcase on the table, to sit at his spot. The moment Sheldon sat down, his expression became alarmed;

"Something's wrong."

Sheldon looked around to spot the difference, and then pointed in horror at his suitcase.

"What's wrong, Sheldon?" Leonard asked, really annoyed at Sheldon probably panicking over nothing.

"My train ticket is gone!" Sheldon stood up, almost spilling his oatmeal, looked around him frantically. He turned to Leonard and asked in a frightened voice, "Did you put it somewhere, or ...misplace it?"

"No I didn't even touch it" Leonard responded. He watched as Sheldon looked under and around his suitcase. Sheldon is really worried, thought Leonard.

*

Penny woke up with a sore mouth; apparently she went to sleep with a smile on her face.

She looked at her alarm; it was 10:25 am. Sheldon and Leonard would leave for the ride to the train station in five minutes. It was the perfect time for revenge.

She grabbed the ticket, and walked with confidence to Sheldon's apartment.

*

"I don't know where it is Sheldon!" Leonard shouted.

Sheldon looked at his watch, "Oh no. It's past the time to leave Leonard."

"Do you think someone broke in and stole it?" Leonard asked sarcastically, to get Sheldon's mind off the time.

Sheldon's face changed with confusion, "Who would want to steal my train ticket?" Then Sheldon's mind clicked and his face changed into contempt and fury.

Sheldon faced the door as it opened, seeing the person he despised more than any of his other enemies; Penny.

"Good morning boys!" Penny yelled.

Penny smirked at the priceless face on Sheldon; he once gave her that look when she prevented him from doing laundry on laundry night. "Hey what are you two still doing here? It's two minutes past ten thirty; shouldn't you guys be driving to the train station by now?" She put on a fake confused face.

"My train ticket is missing," Sheldon muttered.

"Really? Well that's too bad," Penny put both her hands up, one of which had Sheldon's train ticket in, "I have no clue where it could be." She put on a tight smile and said, "Sorry," then slammed the door.

Leonard's mouth was wide open with shock. But Sheldon was quick to react to the confirmation that Penny was a thief. He ran out the door, and caught sight of her just before she entered her apartment.

"Give me back my ticket Penny!"

*

Penny slammed the door and leaned against it, waiting for _'the knock'_.

"Penny."

Knock, knock, knock.

Penny's stomach turned with butterflies, thinking maybe she crossed an even further line than he went.

"Penny!"

Sheldon's voice awkwardly got louder, as if he was trying to keep his emotions under control.

"PENNY!"

Penny opened the door, a tiny crack, and could Sheldon twitching uncontrollably, "yes Sheldon?"

Penny asked with the tiniest hint of concern. But of course, Sheldon didn't notice,

"_Give_ _me back my ticket_," his fierce command and piercing eyes, struck Penny with fear that made her heart skip a beat. The feeling of fear of Sheldon shocked Penny, turning her fear into anger.

"Apologise to me about what you said to me last night, and I'll give the ticket back to you," Penny knew from their last battle; how to stare off with Sheldon.

"Apologies for what? Telling the truth?"

"Say goodbye to your ticket," Penny was closing the door.

Sheldon stopped the door, "Alright, alright."  
Penny opened the door wider; to better hear his words, "I'm waiting."

Sheldon looked Penny in the eyes, and sounded sincere, "I apologise, for what I said last," his voice went an octave lower, "I had not realised that opinions are no longer seen as opinions, but are seen as insults and ego-destroyers." He gave Penny a cold look.

That was not an apology in Penny's mind, so right in front of Sheldon; she ripped the ticket into pieces and dropped them on the floor.

"Don't bother getting angry Sheldon! It's almost eleven, you would've missed train!" Penny slammed the door.

*

Unknown to Sheldon and Penny; Leonard, Howard and Raj had watched that entire fight.

When Penny slammed the door, Sheldon stormed past the three of them and into the apartment. He grabbed his suitcase and headed back out the door, "Come on Leonard, I'm catching the next train to San Francisco. This delay will affect my _entire_ trip," Sheldon gave one last look at Penny's door, and then went down the stairs, suitcase in hands.

As he was walking, Sheldon muttered, "This isn't over, Penny."


	3. Car Debt

_I don't own a car or been to a mechanic, so I don't know how car payments work..._

The next night, Sheldon was on a train back to L.A. Sheldon wasn't enjoying the ride, he hadn't enjoyed the ride yesterday either. His next door neighbour, Penny, was all he could think about. She had spoiled his buzz about trains. When trains got involved, it was personal; he had to think of revenge.

But there was a tiny insignificant voice in his head that said; if you hadn't insulted Penny and apologised properly, you wouldn't be in this situation.

But that voice was easily destroyed. And Sheldon had the perfect plan for pay back. A plan was all he could think about through the conferences in San Francisco, so it was safe to say that the _entire _trip was a complete disaster.

Sheldon was sleepy, but he had to do his plan tonight, when she's not expecting it.

"Coffee, sir?" the trolley lady asked with a table on wheels full of snacks and coffee.

"Yes please," Sheldon received the coffee, and took the tiniest of sips.

*

"There's the train, eleven o'clock on the dot," Leonard said to Penny, as they both waited for Sheldon to arrive.

Penny wanted to make peace with Sheldon, before their fight got out of hand.

The first person off the train they saw was Sheldon, but not in the way they expected. They expected to see Sheldon step off the train, suitcase in hand and walked toward to them. But instead they saw; Sheldon leap off the train and land with a spin on his heels, screaming , "WHEEEEEEE!"

He looked around swiftly as if confused, then relaxed and slammed his hand on his forehead,

"WHOOPS! HA I FORGOT MY SUITCASE ON THE TRAIN!!!"

Without care he pushed other passengers getting off aside to get back into the train.

Leonard and Penny looked at each other thinking; uh oh, Sheldon's had coffee!

Sheldon jumped off the train again but with suitcase in hand and yelling, "I CAN'T BELIEVE I FORGOT MY SUITCASE. I HAVE AN EIDETIC MEMORY I'M NOT MEANT TO FORGET. MAYBE CAFFEINE CAUSES AMMNESSIA, BUT FORGETTING MY SUITCASE WOULDN'T BE CLASSED AS – HEY! THIS SUITCASE IS REALLY HEAVY!" Sheldon grabbed the suitcase in both hands and started to spin fast.

Sheldon kept spinning until he heard Leonard scream, "Watch out Sheldon!"

He stopped, lost his balance and made the person behind him and himself land on the ground.

"SORRY!" Sheldon then turned around to see who he landed on, shock flowed through him; making him think he almost had a heart attack, Penny was looking right back at him.

Sheldon jumped off Penny, and Sheldon remembered his task he had to do tonight. The sight of Penny brought Sheldon's hyper-ness to a lower level.

"_What are you doing here Penny?"_ Sheldon asked in a loud voice.

Penny saw him fidget and his eyes blink hard and fast, "I'm here to make peace. We shouldn't jeopardize our friendship, just because we have different opinions. And I'm sorry for making you miss your train, which was stupid of me."

Sheldon blinked harder, but said nothing. He was battling the two voices in his head, whether he should take revenge or not.

Penny took his silence as not accepting her peace, "fine! Let's not stay friends."

She breathed in hard and heaved out, "Come on; let's get out of here, Jerk-Face."

Jerk-face! The vengeful voice won again. The three of them walked silently to the car park, but Sheldon stopped as he saw which car they were taking. Penny's car, this'll be easier than I thought.

Sheldon laughed out loud, and the two turned back to stare at him, and they came to the conclusion that it was the coffee.

*

The car was mainly silent except for humming a tuneless song. He was sitting at the back, because Penny was driving and Leonard had to sit at the front otherwise he gets car sick.

The humming was a noise distraction so that Penny wouldn't notice him searching her bag. He looked through her wallet and found what he wanted; Penny's spare key to the car in case she left her real keys in the car.

He stopped humming and said, "Your check engine light is on penny. You should take it to a mechanics."

"Shut up Sheldon," Penny said, ending the conversation.

*

Back in her own apartment, she looked at her alarm and 11:45 pm. Penny was very tired so she changed into her pyjamas and tucked herself into bed.

Lying there, she shed some tears. I really am stupid Penny thought, I should have just 'knuckled under' like the guys. If I did that I would still have an annoying, rude, germaphobic and perfectionist friend.

She didn't understand why she kept crying.

*

How come she think she's the one to end our friendship, I'm meant to do that, Sheldon thought as he quietly left his apartment at 7:00 in the morning.

He opened Penny's car with her spare key, and slowly drove away from the apartment parking.

*

It was now lunch time and Howard and Raj were over. A serious issue was the topic of conversation, "So...um...I'm going to ask Bernadette to marry me," Howard said nervously.

Raj and Leonard coughed on the food in shock, but Sheldon flatly said,

"About time, you two have been dating for...almost two years."

"Yeah I know Sheldon, I've been counting," Howard responded.

Then the door to their apartment burst open, Penny came through with fear on her face, "My car's been stolen!"

"Oh no Penny that's awful! I'll call the police," Leonard went to the phone.

"That's not necessary Leonard, the car is fine," Sheldon reassured.

Penny narrowed her eyes, "_where's my car Sheldon?"_

"I drove it to the mechanics, to be fixed," Sheldon calmly stated.

"WHY WOULD DO THAT!?!" Penny yelled.

"So you know what it feels like to be stopped from plans to be somewhere. You stop my train, I stop your car. And also," Sheldon stood up, "The one thing I know you hate is being in dept to someone. I'm paying for your car to be fixed, so knowing you; you'll feel duty-bound to repay me."

"Oh I'll pay you back, _Sheldon_! But for now," Penny put her right and left index and middle fingers on her temples and stared hard at Sheldon.

Sheldon took a few steps back, and then Penny left.

The tears Penny had shed last night are forgotten.


	4. Paintball Battle

_Whoo! The fight is getting serious, Bring on the Paintball battle!!!_

Paintball is what I really need right now Sheldon thought; I need something to distract me from my thoughts of Penny.

Sheldon has been useless at work because his anger for her is practically all he can think about.

Howard, Raj, Leonard and Sheldon were at the paintball registration, "Who are we against Leonard?" Raj asked

"Leslie Winkle's team," Leonard replied looking at a paper.

"Really?" Sheldon asked, "I thought Kripke was sick?" Kripke was on Leslie's team, and you must have four players on your team, at least.

Howard responded, "Well obviously, she's found someone else for her team."

Sheldon thought of other possibilities, "Who could it be?"

"Hello men. Sheldon," Sheldon turned around to see Penny and Leslie.

"Penny, are you on Leslie's team?" Leonard asked, sounding really scared.

Penny had a giant grin on her face, "yes I am Leonard. Leslie called me saying she was up against the four of you, I jumped at the opportunity to," Penny looked at Sheldon, "destroy."

Leslie said, "See you boys out there." Leslie walked past with Penny behind, Penny knocked into Sheldon hard before heading out to the battle zone.

"Oh God we're doomed," Raj said with sorrow.

"Yeah, let's just surrender," Howard started to walk away.

"Wait now, hold on!" Sheldon said firmly, turning toward them.

"We can't give up, that'll give Penny the satisfaction of winning without even raising her dainty fingers!"

"Come on Sheldon," Leonard whined, "We'll be slaughtered!"

"Don't worry, I'm quite confident that Penny will only be aiming to kill me," Sheldon said with no fear.

He raised his paintball gun, "Let's go and face hell, men." Sheldon went through the door to the battle zone.

Leonard, Raj and Howard stood still, Howard then said dramatically, "last time it happened, it was a battle," Thinking of the Saturday of food-touching, laundry night and panty Piñata, "This time...it is WAR."

It was what the three of them had feared would happen, war.

"Come on, we can take on Leslie and her team," Leonard's voice broke, "We can leave Sheldon and Penny to their own battle." They walked through the door to the _war_ zone.

*

"His bravery is inspiring," Penny whispered with emotion, as if she was in a war movie. Usually it would be funny, making things dramatic, like when she hears Raj say at every paintball fight, '_I love the smell of paintballs in the morning.'_

But today paintball was dead serious.

Leslie said out of breath, "From what I know from Sheldon, is that he hates chaos. So just then, when you shot him twice and he shot you back, I believe this battle has descended into anarchy."

Penny didn't need to answer, Leslie's assumption was true.

*

"I'm not as bad at Paintball as you think I am, _Penny,_" Sheldon crouched behind a pile of hay and aimed his gun at Penny. She couldn't see him and didn't know which direction he went, so Penny was like a worm waiting for the bird to strike.

Sheldon shot Penny twice, hitting her chest and shoulder. Leslie had Penny's back; she started shooting around the direction where the shooting came from. One paintball hit Sheldon on the knee, making him yelp out loud.

"He's over there!" Leslie yelled, shooting at Sheldon, but then she got shot on the back, making her turn around to aim for her other opponent.

Sheldon ran out of his spot, aiming for where Penny was, but she wasn't there anymore.

*

Penny had moved into an empty shed. She stood on a hay stack, and pointed her gun out of the narrow windows, and then she waited.

She saw Howard and Raj run past and hide behind a wall; they were close so she could hear what they said;

"I think we're safe here," Howard said out of breath.

Raj then said dramatically, "I _love_ the smell of paintballs in the morning."

Penny smiled and couldn't help laughing. They had heard and instantly put their hands up and started to run again.

*

Sheldon saw Howard and Raj run from their spot. Penny must be there, thought Sheldon, because she wouldn't shoot at them.

From hiding spot to hiding spot, he carefully went closer to Penny's unknown hiding spot.

*

"There he is," Penny whispered.

She didn't want to shoot yet, if she did, she would probably only get to shoot him once and he would hide again and Penny would have to find him again. So she waited for him to get closer to the spot where there were less escape routes. She watched him; Sheldon had a strong back and balanced legs. He's a man, she thought, obviously he was, but at this moment she realised that he's acting the way a real man would. Going back to manly instincts.

Penny shook her head and said that was a silly thought, it was time to focus.

Sheldon was in the spot she wanted him to be, so shot him, over and over and over again.

Unlike most people, they would step back or run from the shots of paint, but Sheldon kept stepping forward, not giving up.

Sheldon went into the shed and started shooting Penny. Neither of them would stop shooting, even though the paintball were _really_ starting to hurt.

"ENOUGH OF THIS! STOP!" Leonard ran into the shed with raised arms, Leslie was behind him, she was also looking from Penny to Sheldon.

Sheldon and Penny stopped their shooting and looked at Leonard angrily.

Raj, Howard and the other members of Leslie's team came in.

Leonard took control of the situation, "The game is over! No more shooting, before serious injuries happen."

Sheldon's team left, then Leslie turned to Penny, "What the hell was that?!? I mean I thought _**I**_ hated Sheldon!"

*

Howard and Raj were lying on the floor, and Raj groaned, "Oh I am so sore."

Sheldon stared at them with angry eyes from the kitchen, "If you think you're sore, look at me!"

He was still in his paintball suit and he was almost covered with blue paint splatters.

Penny let herself in, "hey."

She still had her suit on, it was almost as bad as Sheldon's, and she had her gun in her hand.

Leonard was in the shower, so he couldn't stop anything from happening.

Howard and Raj crawled behind the coffee table, ducking for cover.

Penny and Sheldon were measuring off with each other; Sheldon had a glass of water in his hand and Penny had her paintball gun.

Penny then muttered, "You almost beat me," she had noticed Sheldon had more paint on his suit than on her's.

She continued, "So it means we're not completely even."

"Then what does make us 'even' by shooting me now?" Sheldon raised his eyebrows, not afraid of Penny.

"No this makes us even," Penny aimed her gun at the couch and shot 'Sheldon's' cushion three times. One last look at Sheldon and then Penny left.

Howard and Raj looked at each other, they were seriously scared.


	5. Toys and Letters

If there was one thing, Penny thought, that Sheldon and I have ing common, it would be the hatred for buses.

Penny was on the bus heading to her apartment from a hard day's work at the cheesecake factory. It has been a week since Sheldon stole her car and took it to the mechanics and payed for the check-up and repairs. Sheldon _**paid**_for_**my**_ car to be fixed, even to fix the check engine light, I mean _who_ does that?! Penny thought.  
_Someone who knows that you hate being in debt to anyone,_ another voice in her head stated.

Pressed the bus-stop button and went off the bus. As she was walking toward her apartment building, she felt the pain everywhere around her body from paintball yesterday.

As Penny walked up the stairs in the apartment building, she couldn't help but smile at the memory of shooting Sheldon's cushion...Again. I do love making him squirm, thought Penny.

Penny stopped in her tracks when she saw a post-it on her front door. She grabbed it and read;

_This is for the pain from paintball  
- Sheldon Cooper_

Uh Oh, Penny thought, what did he do this time? She grabbed her key and quickly opened the door. She gasped at the sight before her. She instantly thought of two things; laser tag except with string, covering the entire room, and the movie _Entrapment_ with Catherine Zeta-Jones.

Compared to the other things they've done to each other, it wasn't much of an attack. The only thing Penny was angry about was the fact that he went into her apartment.

With a sore body, Penny painfully stepped, ducked, dipped and crawled to get to her room. To her relief her room was not tied up with string. She went to get change into casual clothes, and she saw the alarm; it was 1:50 pm. Penny instantly thought that Sheldon would still be at work.

Penny rested on her bed, hoping to have a little nap, but then Penny caught sight of another post-it, it was in front of all her cuddly toys. She grabbed it and read;

_This is for shooting my cushion_

_-Sheldon Cooper_

Penny looked around and wondered what he meant. And then she saw it; her favourite most priceless teddy bear was missing from the pile of toys!

Sheldon had sunk to a whole new level of low. Penny felt an anger that made her hands shake.

Penny grabbed scissors from her last draw and started cutting the strings. She went to the bowl where she kept the spare key to Sheldon's apartment. But Sheldon was a step ahead of Penny, because he took the key. So her next option was to drive to his...she stopped her train her thought again, being reminded that he had taken her car too. Penny started to get a headache' Leonard was right to say that Sheldon was one lab accident away from becoming a super villain.

She had to do something! So Penny decided to go for a walk, even though she was as sore as hell, she had to burn some of the anger inside her.

When Penny was about to go down the stairs, Sheldon's apartment door opened. To Penny's joy it was Leonard who opened the door.

"Oh Leonard thank god you're home!" she sounded happy, and then she thought about it and said, "What are you doing home?"

When Leonard saw Penny, he became nervous. Penny thought, he's afraid to speak to his best friend's sworn enemy.

"Well...um...someone stood on my glasses and broke them, so I had to come home," Leonard responded.

"I have some questions for you Leonard," Penny looked at Leonard expectantly and he just nodded.

"Firstly, are you aware that Sheldon went into my home?" Leonard gulped and nodded but quickly explained,

"I tried to stop him, really I did! But Sheldon is _really_ strong!"

"It's ok Leonard, really. My next question is...," Penny looked concerned and worried, she came closer to Leonard and spoke softly, "Is my teddy bear...still alive?"

Leonard got closer and murmured, "hostage is alive, but in a tight situation. It is impossible to get it off criminal with the hostage."

A new plan formed in her head, if Sheldon wanted to play dirty, then Penny will play dirty.

"Can I come in Leonard?"Penny asked.

Leonard looked unsure, "I don't know Penny, you'll pass enemy lines, and Sheldon told me not to."

"So you're going to take orders from _Sheldon?" _Penny sounded sceptical.

"Yes...um...no..yes," Leonard was unsure.

Looks like it's up to my womanly charms, Penny thought. She stepped closer and touched his arm and put on a pout, "please, Leonard."

That was all it took for Leonard to blindly say, "Ok."

Penny went straight to Sheldon's room and burst the door open.

She walked in and looked around. What is personal to him that he would trade my teddy bear? Thought Penny.

She sat on Sheldon's bed, it was the most comfortable bed in the world, Penny thought. Then she saw a frame hanging on the wall, inside it; was the napkin signed by Leonard Nemoy. Penny had a sad smile on her face, when she remembered the feeling she had felt when Sheldon had hugged her. In the moment of the hug she had thought their friendship would last forever. But now, looking back, she could see that that statement was wrong.

Her teddy bear came back into her head, and went back to business. The napkin was a good hostage, she was about to take it when she saw something that could get her to an even deeper level of low, the wooden box that had all his letters from his meemaw. They were one of a kind, and priceless to Sheldon, it was just like her teddy bear. The perfect hostage for hostage trade.

*

Dr. Gablehouser sat impatiently listening to Dr. Winkle and Dr. Cooper complains about each other in his office. Why can't they get along? He thought.

"You're such a dumbass!" Leslie said. Thats why, he though, smiling to himself.

"Yeah well..."Sheldon really sucked at insults. Sheldon's cell in his pocket started to ring a Radiohead song.

He looked at the caller I.D; Penny then turned his cell off.

"Was it Penny?" Leslie asked smiling. Sheldon didn't answer because then Dr. Gablehouser's phone started ringing.

He picked it up and said, "Dr. Gablehouser's office."

He then handed the phone to Sheldon, unsurprised, "It's for you."

"Hello?" Sheldon said.

"_**This is Penny."**_

"What do you want Penny?_"_

"_**My teddy bear,"**_

Sheldon smiled and said, "Well you can't have it."

"_**I suspected as much. That is why I propose an exchange,"**_

"What could I possibly want from you Penny?"

"_**Your Meemaw's letters."**_

Sheldon froze, "what?"

"_**I have the letters from your Meemaw, right next to those letters, I have a match stick."**_

Sheldon didn't hesitate, "Where do you want to meet?"

"_**In front of the Golden Dragon. Bye**__"_ Penny hung up.

Sheldon handed back the phone in a daze, "I have to go," and went to the door.

Leslie asked before he left, "What about all the whiteboards you were hogging?"

Sheldon turned back and calmly responded, "Take them, I don't care," Then he left, leaving Leslie and Dr. Gableouser shocked.

"Wow," Dr. Gablehouser said bluntly, "We should get that woman to call more often."

Leslie didn't reply, she just kept her eyes on the door, looking genuinely worried.

*

Sheldon went to his safe, in his office and opened it, inside was Penny's teddy bear. He specifically took this teddy bear because he knew what it meant to her. It was the one toy that her dad had given her, that was more girly than boyish, which meant a lot to Penny.

He grabbed the teddy bear and scissors; if penny had a match stick to burn the letters, then he had scissors to rip the stuffed toy to shreds.

"Hey Sheldon," Howard and Raj said to Sheldon as he walked past, and they saw the scissors and teddy bear in his hand. Sheldon didn't notice them, he was too focused on where he was going.

When Sheldon turned the corner, They looked at each other, "No doubt heading toward another battle with Penny," Howard said.

"When is the war going to end?" asked Raj.

Then Howard asked, "My question is," he looked at Raj, "_How_ is it going to end?"

_Final battle next chapter... da da DA!!!!_


	6. Final throwdown

The Golden Dragon Restaurant wasn't close to where Sheldon worked, but he had to get there fast. The fastest he could think of right now was...the bus. He did not want to catch the bus, but then the thought of Penny lighting his Meemaw's letters on fire, made him get on the bus without a second thought.

Sheldon looked outside a window on the bus and saw the clouds turn grey and large; there was a chance of rain soon and possible thunder.

Sheldon pressed the button, to get off the next stop. As it was driving to the next stop, it went past the Golden Dragon and there Sheldon saw Penny with his box of letters and a pack of match sticks. She didn't see him yet, and Sheldon noticed that Penny looked, in his eyes, nervous.

He stepped off the bus and slowly walked towards her. As soon as Penny saw him, her face changed to focused and determined state, she wanted her teddy bear safe.

Sheldon stopped two meters away from Penny, and for a moment they just stared of with each other.

"Hello," Sheldon started.

"Hello. Do you have my bear?" Penny replied.

He took out the teddy bear and scissors from his bag.

"Don't hurt her," Penny said, she gripped harder on the box in her hands. Sheldon has no idea what that bear meant to her, Penny thought. Then she could help her high- near shrieking voice from saying what she felt, "Sheldon I want my bear back! Do you know what that bear means to me? It was the only toy my dad that had-" she was cut by Sheldon finishing her sentence.

"-given you, that was more girly than boyish, meaning your dad knows that you're a girl not a boy," Sheldon finished.

"How did you know that, I never told you or Leonard that?" Penny asked suspiciously.

Sheldon stated, "You told Beverly, Leonard's mother, and she told me."

Penny felt the stab of betrayal, she told Beverly that in confidence. She was angry, and before Penny thought it was a bad idea, she opened Sheldon box with his letters, as it started to rain.

"No!" Sheldon came closer, he saw his letters get rain drops on them. So he stabbed her teddy bear and some stuffing fell out.

Penny and Sheldon clashed, grabbing the thing from the other person's hands.

They looked at the wet letters and half filled teddy bears.

They couldn't hold it in anymore, Penny yelled first, "GOD, I HATE YOU!"

"I HATED YOU FIRST!" Sheldon yelled back.

They fluently used their bodies' movement to show anger. Penny waved her hands around, "Do you want to know why I hate you!"

"Enlighten me Penny!" Sheldon looked into her angry eyes. They were both drenched with rain and they were very close to each other.

"I hate your routine to live your life, It annoys me like crazy!" Penny started.

"I hate you unorganised and chaotic life, it makes want to help you, and I hate helping!" Sheldon shot back.

"I hate your germaphobia and your other psychotic traits, like how you hate me touching you. I hate that!"

"I hate your usual use of sarcasm, I don't know when you're being serious or your usual dumb Penny! Another thing; I hate how I have to dumb down a lot of the things I say for you!"

"_I hate it when you say bazinga! I hate how you think you're better than everyone, ESPESCIALLY ME!"_ People in the Golden Dragon were watching.

"_I hate how you're a big ol' five!"_ Sheldon and Penny were losing it.

"_**What?!"**_

Sheldon thought she was confused,_ "In other words; __**I hate how you're a BIG SLUT!"**_

Penny punched Sheldon in the face.

*

"Thanks for inviting me over, I really needed a place to crash. I don't want to go back to the war zone," Leonard said to Raj.

Raj, Howard and Leonard were watching an Indian movie at Raj's apartment.

"Quite alright Leonard," Raj responded.

They were eating pizza for a change, not caring about Sheldon's schedule. They doubted Sheldon would even care, with the Penny occupying his entire head.

"We're _really _worried about your safety," Howard said sarcastically.

"I'm more worried about Sheldon and Penny's safety," Leonard responded seriously.

But then all three laughed and poked each other with the index finger. They weren't worried about Sheldon and Penny at all.

They were still laughing when Leonard's mobile rung, he looked at it and ID caller was unknown, smiling Leonard answered, "Hello?"

Howard and Raj looked at Leonard, as his smile faded away, "are you alright?"... "right... "Well I'll come right over."

Leonard hung up and looked worried at Howard and Raj, "Sheldon and Penny got arrested. They're at the police station."

"Oh my god," Howard and Raj said in sink.

"I can't believe that their fighting went so far as to be arrested!" Raj grabbed his keys and headed for his car, with Howard and Leonard behind him.

*

Sheldon hung up on his one call at the police station. He handed it back to the cop, then turned to Penny sitting a few chairs away, "Leonard's on his way,"

Penny nodded; she kept her eyes on Sheldon. He had refused to have a raw piece of stake on his face to help with the large bruise near his left eye. His hair was drying but it was still messy from the noogying she had given him. He moved around his sore right shoulder and his eyes were drooping, he was really tired.

"I'm sorry," the words gently rolled out of her, she meant those words.

Sheldon looked at Penny; her hair was a mess like his and she had red marks over her arms and she looked exhausted. She had a tiny smile on her face, and he couldn't stop the words,

"I'm sorry too."

The wall that was blocking them from each other had fallen away.

"I'm sorry I punched you."

"I deserved it. I'm sorry I gave you all those Indian burns."

"That's okay, I'm sure it was the worst you could do to a girl," Penny laughed and Sheldon smiled.

"I'm sorry for all the things I said to you, including the remark that started this entire feud, about your performance in Avenue Q."

"I'm sorry for all the things I did to you, including the event that triggered the battles, the train delay."

"I'm sorry I was too proud to apologise when you wanted it," Sheldon said.

"That's okay because in those moments I really just wanted you to feed my ego," Penny said. Sheldon remembered saying that.

They smiled to each other and Penny thought that their friendship could last forever.

*

Leonard walked into the police station and saw Sheldon and Penny smiling at each other.

"Well this is just great isn't it?" Leonard asked.

"It took a punch in the face and a trip to the police station, for you two to finally make peace!"

Sheldon and Penny just stared at the floor and Leonard continued, "You both are complete idiots," He sighed in frustration,

"I'll pay for your fine, but you two are walking home."

He walked away, leaving Penny and Sheldon feeling like idiots.

"Seeing as we're already called idiots, do you want to do something completely idiotic with me?" Penny asked, looking into his blue eyes.

Sheldon asked curiously, "what did you have in mind?"

_I said it was the final battle not the final chapter, so don't worry there will be another. I've never been in a police station so I don't know what they do to people who disturb the peace and start fights._


	7. See Truth Through Song

"Another round," Penny said to the bartender at the cheesecake factory bar. He poured two more shots for Penny and Sheldon. They drunk it then Penny said, "Leonard took your meemaw's letters and my teddybear home, so they are safe. Now what were we talking about before we were talking about that?"

"I don't remember," Sheldon laughed at his remark, "But I'm changing the subject to...Beverly."

Penny poked her tongue out at the mention of the back stabber. Sheldon continued "Do you know what sad about my relationship with you?"

"No, what?" Penny asked, curious now.

"She says we're in a love/hate formulated relationship. The two of us are polar opposites and love and hate are polar opposite feelings. Love and hate are intimately linked within the human brain, according to a study that has discovered the biological basis for the two most intense emotions.

Scientists studying the physical nature of hate have found that some of the nervous circuits in the brain responsible for it are the same as those that are used during the feeling of romantic love – although love and hate appear to be polar opposites. It can be argued that, due to the fact that the subjects, us, are friends despite issues we have, a love hate relationship represents a stronger bond than a simple love relationship does," Sheldon took a bite at a bread stick.

Penny narrowed her eyes in confusion, "Ok, whatever," then Penny mumbled, "Didn't understand a thing you said."

Penny ordered a Cuba Libre for Sheldon and a Grasshopper for herself. Halfway through their drinks, Sheldon admitted, "I enjoyed your performance in Avenue Q Penny. The only reason I said those things to you a while ago, was because I've seen it hundreds of times. My aunt loves it and so she taught me the songs on the piano and made me see it every time it came around."

"Really?" Penny asked, "What was your favourite song?"

Sheldon took another sip of his drink, "Your favourite is my favourite."

"My favourite is the part I had played. I was Christmas Eve and the song was The more you Ruv someone."

"Then come on Penny," Sheldon grabbed Penny's hand, with his drink in the other hand.

"What are we doing Sheldon?" Penny asked as Sheldon lead her to the stage with the keyboard.

"We're doing the song. I know how to play it and you know how to sing it. It's a duet isn't it?"

"Yes but, but, but," Penny didn't know how to argue.

Sheldon sat down and the keyboard, "Come on, your voice isn't that bad."

Penny rolled her eyes, she wasn't sure if she should take that as an insult or compliment, "Fine, but afterwards I'm going to kill you."

"You should've done that hours ago," Sheldon smiled and checked if the keyboard was on.

Penny turned on Sheldon's microphone then turned on her hers, which was on a mike stand next to the keyboard.

Peple at their tables turned to watch the stage. Penny was nervous. Stupid drunk Sheldon, Penny thought.

Penny sung the first verse with the piano quietly playing in the background like the song starts;

"_**The more you love someone,  
The more you want to kill him.  
The more you love someone,  
The more he make you cry,**_**"  
**  
_**"Though you are try  
For making peace  
With them and loving,"**_My voice sounds high, Penny thought, I'm singing terribly, Damn Sheldon!_  
_

"_**That's why you love so strong  
you like to make him"**_Penny turned and faced Sheldon "_**die!**_"

But the anger faded away instantly as Penny looked at Sheldon's smiling face. That was the moment Penny fell for Sheldon. Who knows why, Penny thought. It could be the liquor talking, but all she knows right now is that she's in love.

Penny sung the next verse deeper and with meaning in her words;

_**"The more you love someone,  
The more he make you crazy.  
The more you love someone,  
The more you wishing him dead!"**_

_**"Sometime you look at him  
and only see a head on a stick,"**_

Sheldon giggled, "Those aren't the lyrics Penny," still playing the song.

Penny smiled, "I know that, but you're not fat and lazy."

Sheldon looked confused, "What are you implying"

"Shut up," Penny said. She had to skip the next two lines to keep up with the piano, it was up to the duet;

_**"Love,"**_

_**"Love," **_continued Sheldon.

_**"And hate,"**_

"And hate,"

"They like two brothers,"

"Brothers,"

_**"Who go on a date," Penny sung.**_

Sheldon giggled again, "That's the funniest part of the play!"

Penny's voice got stronger;

_**"Where one of them goes,  
Other one follows  
You inviting love  
He also bringing sorrows"**_

"Your singing great Penny," Sheldon smiled.

Sheldon played faster, the song was near to the climax;

_**"The more you love someone,  
The more you want to kill him.  
Loving and killing  
fit like hand in glove!"  
**_  
Here came the climax, Penny was putting her heart and soul into the moment;

_**"So if there someone  
You are wanting so  
To kill him."**_

Sheldon slowed the piano down, and Penny's voice went softer;

_**"You go and find him."**_

Penny took the microphone off the stand;

_**"And you get him."**_

She walked towards the piano and shook her head;

_**"And you no kill him."**_

Penny slowly sat next to Sheldon on the piano seat;

_**"Cause chances good,"**_

Then they both sung the last line, as Sheldon concluded to song;

_**"He is your loooooove."**_

Penny closed her eyes, pouted her lips and waited for Sheldon to kiss her. But Sheldon just said, "Great song," then walked off the stage with his almost empty drink.

When she opened her eyes, Sheldon was back at the bar. Obviously he didn't feel the moment she had felt.

"Crap," Penny said, "I'm in love with a man who doesn't have a '_deal',_"


End file.
